again, or not really, I don’t know, this blog thing…. or to be more accurate these blogs.
I have a baby blog about Gabe, a blog I only speak of him, a tribute if you will. But to be honest all my life is a tribute, these days I feel that the reason I’m alive today is to be is mother, something inside of me screams out loud that he had to be born, that he had to be my soon and I his mother.
These days my life is like a fading picture and the only clear image is him. He is my today, my tomorrow, my everything, my reason to exist.

Yes, I admit, freako, crazy, loony, totally toasted from the brains… Until very recently I really thought that was a bad thing, being different and labeled as weirdo, but hei…now a days I don’t mind that much. Better being crazy that being like everyone else… 

Reasons why I’m weird: don’t talk much, don’t do friends easily, everyone looks from another world to me (and I show it more often than I would want to), I like to do my job (yes apparently that’s a very strange thing), I’m Portuguese, living in Spain, and at home, with my husband, we speak more English than anything else, I believe in freedom and love, I do not believe in monogamy (all do in a relationship everything has to be consensual, you do not have a affair unless both are in agreement), I eat to much and sometimes not enough… and I could go on.

There are many of us out there, roaming the world, being sometimes outcast and sometimes accepted. But at least we are not sheep. In the land of the blind we can see, some of us take advantage of it and some of us don’t.

Anyway every time people say I’m strange, I’m going to say:  thank you, I wouldn’t be  you for all the money in the world.

So, for all de weirdo’s out there: Rock on!! Be true to yourself, the people you love and your principles, the rest of the world…well …

Claro que me pareçe que é comum a todas as mães o medo, o medo de que algo corra mal agora, e depois, e a bem dizer para todo o sempre. Mas pela minha parte prefiro fechar o medo numa caixinha e esperar pelo melhor. Tudo pode aconteçer… mas nada na vida é certo, e pouco a pouco vamos aprendendo que apesar do mau poder acontecer a qualquer momento, o bom quando vem…é do melhor que pode haver. 

Aqui vai uma foto do piqueno (ou melhor da minha pança ) 

Já lá vai um tempão desde que não escrevo nada… Mas com um bom motivo, há cerca de umas semanas que tudo mudou e ficou  de pernas para o ar. Para quem não sabe (que devem ser muitos poucos já, ) o Gabriel vem a caminho.
Desde que descobrio que estava grávida, até hoje, que cada día é um dia diferente, não só pelas mudanças fisicas (que são imensas como devem calcular), mas por todo o sentimento que o facto de ir ser mãe traz…
Os principios que vamos transmitir ao Gabriel , já há muitos anos que estao mais que definidos…Um processo gradual, quase a partir do dia em resolvemos (ou fomos resolvendo) ser um casal, que mais do que tudo nos fez ter uma compreensão  semelhante (e ao mesmo tempo distinta mas complementar), do mundo que queremos que o Gabriel perceba, em tudo de bom e de mau que tem. Posso dizer sinceramente que somos farinha do mesmo saco, não conheçemos ninguem, que neste momento, seja capaz de ensinar e mostrar ao Gabriel tudo o que queremos.
Sem querer demasiado presunçosa, mas já sendo, este futuro homem que trago dentro de mim neste momento vai ser um génio…não porque acredite que vai ter um QI de 200, mas porque vai, além de tudo e primeiro que nada, estar atento ao mundo.

Mas claro…nem tudo são rosas, ou melhor nem tudo na vida é assim tão linear…mas tenta-se, dá-se o tudo por tudo, e se falharmos…voltamos a tentar.

Quando me apeteça logo adiciono uma foto ou outra, hoje sinceramente não me apeteçe…

Imagine to be stuck in time for all eternity. To live the same moment over and over again. Imagine to stop, forever, reliving the worst moment of your live… Imagine if this is the only thing that exists.

One of the most unpopular theories about life, is one that really nobody one wants to be true, I imagine that we even prefer that after this, there is nothing, as to imagine, that exists something, but that something is just to must to bear.

The world population, we believe, is now a bit over 6.60 billion people. How many of these 6.60 billion are perfectly content and happy with their life’s?  I would guess, and this is only a guess, about 10% . 10% are lucky and don’t mind living the same life over and over, but what about all the rest of us, that wait, and pray, that after death there is something better, something wonderful, and even a chance to do it all over again in another life, another body, another time.

This theory suggests that we are bound to live in this time, in this body, repeatedly, all thru eternity. That at some point of our existence the universe will collapse within it sell, and expand again, starting life, from the beginning, just  as it was.
This is a very simplistic explanation, but there is a very small chance that it might be the correct one. It would explain why some people can see the future (because it already happened before, and will happen again), why do we have “dejá vu”, why sometimes we have the feeling something is wrong (is not because we are psychic, but because we have already been there, many, many times before).

This a scary thought, because in a way we are stuck in time, this will repeat it self, we will live the exact same thing, we will commit the exact same mistakes, we will be here over and over, without conscience of it. There is no after life, because everyone will be at this time, at one point or another. I will see my cousin again, and he will die again.

So as I have heard, from a very wise man, a long time before, get it right this time around, because really, this time, is all you have.